 
|
Page 1 of 1
|
[ 7 posts ] |
|
Compute Helpdesk Horrors |
|
Tas
|
Post subject: Compute Helpdesk Horrors  Posted: Tue Oct 12, 2004 2:12 am |
|
| Brood Brother |
 |
 |
Joined: Thu Mar 06, 2003 10:01 am
Posts: 7823
Location: Sydney, NSW
|
Enjoy!
Tas
HELPDESK LOG...
Helpdesk: What kind of computer do you have?
Female customer: A white one...
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Hi, this is Celine. I can't get my diskette out.
Helpdesk: Have you tried pushing the button?
Customer: Yes, sure, it's really stuck.
Helpdesk: That doesn't sound good; I'll make a note ..."
Customer: No ... wait a minute... I hadn't inserted it yet... it's still
on my desk... sorry ....
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Helpdesk: Click on the 'my computer' icon on to the left of the screen.
Customer: Your left or my left?
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Helpdesk: Good day. How may I help you?
Male customer: Hello... I can't print.
Helpdesk: Would you click on start for me and ...
Customer: Listen pal; don't start getting technical on me! I'm not Bill
Gates damn it!
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Hi good afternoon, this is Martha, I can't print. Every time I try it
says 'Can't find printer'. I've even lifted the printer and placed it in
front of the monitor, but the computer still says he can't find it...
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Customer: I have problems printing in red...
Helpdesk: Do you have a color printer?
Customer: Aaaah....................thank you.
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Helpdesk: What's on your monitor now ma'am?
Customer: A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me in the supermarket.
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Helpdesk: And now hit F8.
Customer: It's not working.
Helpdesk: What did you do, exactly?
Customer: I hit the F-key 8-times as you told me, but nothing's
happening...
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Customer: My keyboard is not working anymore.
Helpdesk: Are you sure it's plugged into the computer?
Customer: No. I can't get behind the computer.
Helpdesk: Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back.
Customer: OK
Helpdesk: Did the keyboard come with you?
Customer: Yes
Helpdesk: That means the keyboard is not plugged in. Is there another
keyboard?
Customer: Yes, there's another one here. Ah...that one does work!
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Helpdesk: Your password is the small letter a as in apple, a capital
letter V as in Victor, the number 7.
Customer: Is that 7 in capital letters?
--------------------------------------------------------------------
A customer couldn't get on the internet.
Helpdesk: Are you sure you used the right password?
Customer: Yes I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it.
Helpdesk: Can you tell me what the password was?
Customer: Five stars.
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Helpdesk: What antivirus program do you use?
Customer: Netscape.
Helpdesk: That's not an antivirus program.
Customer: Oh, sorry...Internet Explorer.
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Customer: I have a huge problem. A friend has placed a screensaver on my
computer, but every time I move the mouse, it disappears!
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Helpdesk: Microsoft Tech. Support, may I help you?
Old woman: Good afternoon! I have waited over 4 hours for you. Can you
please tell me how long it will take before you can help me?
Helpdesk: Uhh..? Pardon, I don't understand your problem?
Old woman: I was working in Word and clicked the help button more than 4
hours ago. Can you tell me when you will finally be helping me?
----------
Helpdesk: How may I help you?
Customer: I'm writing my first e-mail.
Helpdesk: OK, and, what seems to be the problem?
Customer: Well, I have the letter a, but how do I get the circle around
it?
------------------------------------------------------------ 
_________________
Tas
My General blog: http://tasmancave.blogspot.com/
My VSF Blog: http://pauljamesog.blogspot.com/
My ECW Blog: http://declaresir.blogspot.com/
|
|
| Top |
|
 |
|
Mojarn Piett
|
Post subject: Compute Helpdesk Horrors Posted: Tue Oct 12, 2004 6:25 am |
|
| Brood Brother |
|
 |
Joined: Fri Feb 14, 2003 7:35 am
Posts: 5455
Location: Finland
|
Works the other way around, too. For example, my colleague's monitor broke. It took a week for the IT department to call him back. If I hadn't happened to have a spare one he would obviously have done nothing for a week... 
_________________
I don't know and I let who care. -J.S.
|
|
| Top |
|
|
|
Warmaster Nice
|
Post subject: Compute Helpdesk Horrors Posted: Tue Oct 12, 2004 10:59 am |
|
| Brood Brother |
|
Joined: Tue Sep 30, 2003 9:15 pm
Posts: 7948
Location: Denmark
|
|
| Top |
|
|
|
netepic
|
Post subject: Compute Helpdesk Horrors Posted: Tue Oct 12, 2004 1:27 pm |
|
| Brood Brother |
|
Joined: Thu Feb 13, 2003 4:26 pm
Posts: 7016
Location: Southfields, London, England
|
|
Welcome to a day in my life...
|
|
| Top |
|
|
|
TuffSkull
|
Post subject: Compute Helpdesk Horrors Posted: Tue Oct 12, 2004 2:13 pm |
|
| Brood Brother |
|
 |
Joined: Tue Feb 25, 2003 11:49 am
Posts: 2830
Location: South East UK
|
LOL, My gardening boss had a good one along similar lines.
He got a new computer & booted it up, except he'd wired the keyboard wrongly (he's not very technically minded...).
So a message pops up something along the lines of "No Keyboard has been found on this system. This may affect operating some programs. Press F1 to continue"
Press F1?
It just identified that there was no keyboard........
So He called me to ask what to do & I said re-wire & reboot.
When he asked how, I couldnt resist saying press alt+ctrl+del
_________________ Cheers, Paul "TuffSkull" T. http://hobbybrush.com - My New Website, with thousands of painted Mini Pics :) http://hobbybrush.blogspot.com - My Hobby Blog TuffSkull's notepad- My Old Blog on Wargames Wiki.
|
|
| Top |
|
|
|
iblisdrax
|
Post subject: Compute Helpdesk Horrors Posted: Tue Oct 12, 2004 3:28 pm |
|
| Brood Brother |
|
Joined: Mon Oct 13, 2003 10:54 pm
Posts: 3381
Location: First star to the right, and straight on till morning.
|
Hehe....nice ones!
my 2cents,
iblisdrax
_________________
"Have Leman Reuss, will travel"
"Hallo. My name is Indigo Montoya. You killed my father prepare to die!"
|
|
| Top |
|
|
|
|
Page 1 of 1
|
[ 7 posts ] |
|
